Mother

Am I not fit to be a mother? 

Is it wrong to decide and plan what I want for my baby?

Why do I have to work and leave my baby to the care of others?

Will my baby be close to me when he's all grown up?

The lists of questions is endless and with no support, I feel like I'm falling off the cliff. The amount of stress, fear, worry and pain I held all these while, I'm never sure how long I could last. Limited time with the little one and there is so much that I can do, but I couldn't. Why do I let others control this? Why can't I be more firm? Why am I so weak? 

Oh Allah, please guide me. please give me the strength to go through this.

Procastination

I think I procastinate too much. So I decided to just end my honeymoon posts and other posts I wished to write. Heh.⌣

MANCHESTER

The day we land in Manchester was our very first day of honeymoon. We arrived in the morning, had a quick rest before heading out to explore. We stayed at Copthorne Manchester Hotel for obvious reasons (think Man U).

The room was pretty nice and it's only for a night stay so no complains.

*picture from website

First stop : The glory Old Trafford Stadium. It was just minutes away so we walked. The husband was super excited even when we're metres away from the stadium, like a kid seeing a candy store.

We didn't purchase any tickets online prior to this but we got lucky coz there are tickets available for the Stadium Tour. There's a museum tour included and we did that first since we had time before the Stadium Tour. Suka sangat lah Mr.Husband tu sampai kena ignore for most of the time k. Kusyuk sangat. *rolls eyes*

At every end of any tours we will land ourselves in the gift shop area right? Can go crazy ok just looking at all the merchandise. we obviously did grab some stuffs (for keepsake and souvenirs for ManU fans only). There was this cute little baby wear and we both wanted to buy, then we contemplated - to buy or not to buy -will it just give us hopes (let's say we couldn't conceive yet). In the end, we did not buy and we regret it now. Hahahaha.

After spending the whole morning entertaining the husband with his ManU "obsession", we decided to head down to the city area coz we're both STARVING! We haven't had any food since morning and it was already past lunch time!

Took the train down to Piccadilly and went for food hunting. We stumbled upon this Halal Chinese "Takeway" shop and it was like those typical Chinese takeaway food you often see in movies or tv series. Me being so jakun (just because I want to eat out of that paper box) , we decided to eat there. The serving was kinda big and the food was good too!

Since we're in Piccadilly, we booked our train ticket to London Euston and Wembley Central for the next day.

After that, I demanded to go to Primark coz I've already did my research knowing there is one there and confirmed it coz I saw it along the way in the train. heh heh. As usual, the husband complained why is there shopping involved. but..... I managed to proved him otherwise! Comparing to the both of us, he actually went NUTS shopping in Primark. He went like "Eh murah lah" "eh lawa lah b" HAHAH TOLD YA! PRIMARK IS A MUST!

xoxo,

Fiqah

SIN - DOHA - MANCHESTER

And finally, the long awaited post. It's been what? 8-9 months since the honeymoon? Hahaha.. better late than never?

Oh how I miss our honeymoon... The cold weather, the shopping.. I just don't want to go back.

We decided to go for our honeymoon a week after our wedding coz of two things;

1: to avoid my period week.

2: to take advantage of the CNY holidays = 2 lesser AL taken

Our flight was on a Thursday, 4th Feb 08.25 pm. We headed to the airport early and had tea with my grandparents who wanted to send us off. We had some time to walk around after checking in and chill for awhile before the flight. Actually we had the lounge pass access coz the husband was a Silver member for Qatar Airways but we decided to skip it.

I was so ready for the flight, I put on my "flight" outfit - comfy sweaters and jeans and comfy-styled shawl. I had my ever so comfy IKEA cushion and some little snacks/sweets. This was the most comfortable flight I've been. The seats are nice and comfy and had a good leg space. The previous flights was just okay. I still remember the first hijab flight to Korea (the first flight since I wore the hijab), it was OMG-to the max uncomfortable. Partly was because the hijab was a little bit to the tight side and the bun was blocking my head from being able to rest on the head rest. I had headaches and it was just horrible. So learning from that incident, I tried and tested which style was the most comfy yet good looking and not to tie my hair so tight. Pasal naik flight je dah banyak drama queen eh. hahaha.

Since my husband was the Qatar Silver member, he had the privilege of  choosing the main for the in-flight dinner. Me on the other hand tumpang privilege coz I'm his wife. HEHE.

And so we landed in Doha and had an hour before the next flight to Manchester!

Arriving in Machester.... and so our honeymoon begins. OMG ok. I is very EXCITED! But the husband is more excited than me coz it's the place of his Glory Glory Man United!

Oh, the only reason why we're here is because of this. But it's okay, I get my turn next. Heeeeee...

We arrived early in the morning at around 6 plus going to 7. We managed to purchase the sim card with unlimited data at one of the shops and it was cheap! It can be used anywhere in Europe including Paris! YAY!

We had to cab down to our hotel coz that was the only option we had. Checked-in and rest for awhile before continuing our day.

xoxo,

Fiqah

Next up

Next will be a short summary of :

- Our Honeymoon
- Trip to Abu Dhabi / Dubai

xoxo,

Fiqah

The Wedding Part 2

and here it is... The Majlis / Lunch Reception

 

So arriving at SPGG, we both headed to the meeting room provided for us to change to our nikah outfits. We had a quick bite and drinks before headed out for Hadang.
 

Usually hadang is held when a couple have separate receptions, the groom and entourage will be coming down to the bride's. There will be  number of "gates" he gotta pass through before he can see the bride. We both wanted the hadang tradition and went on with it for our reception. Actually bukan leceh sangat pun.... it's just a matter of timing so guests won't "catch" us before the hadang.

Groom getting ready with the help of bestmen.... hahaha NOT! ni posing untuk gambar je. The one who helped making the "bunga" for the songket is Abg Khai (our photographer). hahahaha

HEHE. ni semua sempat je....

Walking down the aisle.... the feeling... gementar habis. hahah

Abang2 dah ready lah nak tempuh hadang....

1st Gate

2nd Gate

Denda : Joget

3rd Gate

Denda : Belanja satu lagu

He sang my fav song! macam tau aje kena nyanyi...

4th Gate

The Final Gate

Both families unite. 

First, I gotta say that the deco was FAB! It is what I wanted and I was amazed at how beautiful it is. Well done Comel Molek.

The Hadangs were hilarious. First was my younger cousins, kena ketuk mintak duit. Then off to the next one with my cousin & aunt - lawn pantun, in the end the guys kalah and kena denda joget. Hahahah! Gotta see the video, kekek gila. Then moving on to the third one with my male cousins where he gotta sing before the can pass through. BEST lah macam ni. And out of all the songs he knew, he choose to sing my fav song! Haisss.. merdu lah suara you.... *insert shy mentel face* suka suka suka. Last hadang was with my bridesmaids where he was bombarded with questions. hahaha..

Oh oh, can I just say that WE LOVE LOVE the Kompang. My husband keep on saying, "bagus kan dorang". I couldn't agree more. We were both grinning at how good they are and trying to make our muka maintain face throughout. Akrab Kompang is the best!

So after all the hadangs and kompang performance, it was time to salam-salam the parents and photo taking session. Right after that, I start to feel hungry and YAY! Time to makan. but hey... not so fast k. you still gotta pose for pics when you're eating. Like this....

alalalalala..... sweet nye couple ni. HAHAHA... 

So when all the photo taking / video taking is done, it is really time to makan! we gotta be fast coz we still gotta change to our last outfit. The food.... is so damn good! At that time I wished I was the guest so I can stuff myself with all the good food! Comel Molek, you did it again.

 

& finally the last one with our final outfit. Mr. Farhan, you're looking so damn fine. I instantly melt seeing him wear like that. That was his first and I'm glad that he's brave enough to do it. So proud, so proud. 

Cake cutting time with my own baked wedding cake! YAY! I can't believe that I made my own wedding cake! 3 tiers with all different flavours! 

Bottom tier - Chocolate Cake with Chocolate Ganache.
Second tier - Coconut Cake with Cream Cheese frosting.
Top tier - Red Velvet with Cream Cheese frosting.

The nerve wrecking part is the transportation of the cake coz I was not there! I had to put my trust on my sisters and cousins and bridesmaids for that. Do you know how nervous I am? There was a slight mishap but it was covered, thankfully I had buttercreams and other tools prepared just in case. Since I can't be there to decorate the table, I asked my aunt (she's a baker too) for help. Cantik kan cake ku... HEHEHE. 

Cake cutting done, photo taking done, video done and time to close the reception! Finally! 

Towards the end of the day, we're both so damn tired with all the smiling and posing. We're like "Bila nak habis ni?" HAHAHA perangai. PENAT k. Really. 

 

But putting that aside, we enjoyed every single moment throughout the whole day. We couldn't be happier surrounded with our loves ones, our best friends and relatives and our guests. 

 

And taking this opportunity we both would like to thank every one who made it possible for our wedding to happen, not forgetting those who came to make it more lively. We're both grateful with all the help we got from both our families. To our vendors, thank you for making it the wedding we both had always wanted.

 

La Rosa Bridal - Andaman & Photography

Thank you Kak Ros and Abg Khai for the amazing experience. I fell in love with your outfit the first time I saw on IG and will always be. Thank you Kak Ros for making me the most beautiful bride and looking fab especially in that Elsa songket dress. Hehe.

 

Comel Molek - Catering & Deco & Venue Coordinator

Thank you Uncle Lan for making my dream came true. I didn't give specific instructions on how I want the deco to be, just colours and ideas and it came out fab! The food was absolutely delicious and so many of our relatives and guests compliments it.

Abang Diki & Rachel - Videography

Thank you to my cousin for agreeing with taking our wedding video. It came out perfect and it will soon be an annual thing for both Farhan & I to watch on our wedding anniversary.  

Akrab - Kompang

You guys memang the best lah! Thank you for entertaining our guests with the beautiful kompang melody and performance. 

Medialite - DJ

Thank you for entertaining our guests and making our event a lively one! 

Finally, last lovey dove photo of us. :)

xoxo,
Fiqah

The Wedding Part 1

…the day that I’ve been waiting for. To be united as one with my love.

Who would’ve thought that we could get married one day?... and here we are after all those years, united as one, always and forever...

There were mixed feelings that morning, the wedding jitters. It hit me around an hour before the akad nikah. I can’t sit still and keep wondering what time we’ll be leaving the house. That heartbeat was insane; it kept getting worse once we step out of the house.

The moment I stepped out of the car and enter the mosque, I told myself, this is it. This is what you’ve been waiting for. Bismillah.
 

The usual routine kicks in when we meet our relatives, salam here and there, take photos and everybody was excited!
 

I’ve told my parents that I wanted to sit on the ground, the same level as my husband during the nikah; they agreed. And so, there’s always somebody in the family that will boss you around and die die wants you to listen to them. And yeah, it happened to me. Not my own relative but his. So his aunt told me to sit on the chair and I said politely that I want to sit on the ground. She keeps insisting me to sit on the chair. Like hello, aku nak kahwin ke kau? Like who’s gonna listen to you when you’re just a nobody to me right? So I just went on and sit on the ground and not bother about her. Ha ha. You don’t own me makcik.
 

And then, the kadi came… oh……my heartbeat keeps going dap dup dap dup very fast like a race car.
 

I knew that my father would give me away / nikahkan, so I’m mentally prepared (not so much on the emotional part though). The moment I heard my father’s voice saying, “Aku nikahkan kau bersama anak kandungku…” tears flowing down like a river. I can’t control myself. Nasib bridesmaid kat sebelah boleh tolong lap lap kan. Emo habis ok.
 

Then after all that jazz, it’s time to sign the documents. Just imagine eh, nak sign pun boleh nangis tau. Wth fiqah, asal emo sangat ni. Hahahah
 

It feels so surreal, being married. Alhamdullilah, the nikah went well.
 

We had a mini photo taking session and everyone head to SPGG for the reception and lunch. Stay tune for the next part...

//Photos taken by La Rosa 

Some of the dulangs made by me. This one is from him to me.

and that is from me to him.

"Aku nikahkan dikau..."

xoxo,
Fiqah